|Whenever I'm upset I engage in a three-state cleaning spree. Anyone who's shared an apartment with me knows that when he/she comes home and smells bleach, it's best to lock the door and come back later.|innuendo6.html|_self
|A few tips:|innuendo6.html|_self
*|No break-up is over until the laundry's done and the refrigerator's cleaned out. Get rid of unpleasant food he'd/she'd eat and you wouldn't touch. I recommend baking soda for both jobs, and it's less abrasive than you are.|innuendo6.html|_self
*|During a relationship, make sure your lover has his/her own soaps, shampoos, deodorants. That way, the next psycho with Zest on his skin and Finesse in his hair smells like danger.||innuendo6.html|_self
*|Coordinate break-ups seasonally. If you don't want to sleep on those sheets again, toss out your lover in January and head for the white sales. Alternatively, screw the sheets and wait till Fleet Week.|innuendo6.html|_self
*|Involve your girlfriends. Teach them the system. If you break up with someone you've dated casually, your girlfriends know to knock at your door with a bottle of generic bleach. Should your husband of 20 years buy a Miata and move in with his secretary, they come over with a Sears steam cleaner and a gift-wrapped Orkin Man.|innuendo6.html|_self
|While cleaning goes a long way toward making a woman feel human again, I believe the best balm is purchasing formalwear.|innuendo6.html|_self